In the context of a monogamous or polyamorous relationship, our deepest needs and most challenging insecurities tend to arise in powerful ways. When deciding to seek partner therapy with our significant other(s), there is an inherent choice to work on the relationship as a whole. Often, one partner will decide that the other partner needs to change, and this can lead to a feeling of stuck-ness and a sense of resentment that continues to build and negatively influence other aspects of the relationship.
Partner therapy acknowledges that each person has a unique experience of the relationship, and each person has needs that are seeking to be met by remaining in the relationship. If a partner feels that the relationship no longer holds meaning for them, there will be very little work to do. Partner therapy fosters an experience of mutuality, exploring and supporting each partner's yearning for the other, while honoring the idea that no relationship is perfect and some challenges are greater than others to navigate together. Every relationship includes challenges, differences among individuals, and conflicts. Relationships that last involve a mutual desire to nurture and support the other, honoring the differences and accepting that which cannot be neatly resolved.
Through narrative and experiential interventions, including restorative experiences and creative expression, partners who engage in therapy together build on their trust and demonstrate a continuing commitment to growing together, rather than drifting apart. Relationships are ultimately an ongoing series of choices, and the choice to persevere is a complex interaction of our joys, our wounds, our needs, and our desires.